Educating Children Without Emotions (TIPS &KEY) | Mr. Sholeh's T-shirt

The mother of the Family Consultation Rubric that God blessed, my son is 4 years old, is now recalcitrant. One time I scolded him as much as possible, because of his behavior that made me embarrassed when there were guests. Because of his anger, I came out with disrespectful words, had time to swear. Maybe it's because I'm less patient, Mom, and too tired. I am now 7 months pregnant, and have to babysit her 2 toddler siblings. Not to mention my other activities, teaching and college. I ended up getting emotional when I faced the kids. Children become victims, and make them closer to their father. What should I do. Jazakillah for his advice.

In harmony with the growth and development, in children under five will usually begin to occur behavioral changes. Among them is the appearance of the child's rejection of his social environment. As the ego of these children begins to appear, they begin to want to distinguish themselves from others. At that moment, the little one began to try his own desires. These changes are then perceived by parents that children become difficult to manage, recalcitrant, willing themselves and so on, which often then often cause hassles in treating them. This condition, God willing will subside with age, the development of thinking skills and other abilities.

Sometimes our emotions will indeed be provoked when facing a "wayward" child, like to act especially when there are guests.  Holding back emotions (anger) is not easy. But as is the character, that emotion is part of instinct, then when the desire to be angry does not have to be fulfilled. But it can be diverted or delayed (detained).  You should be able to assess and understand your own emotional levels, at what time and what kind of situation usually arises. So you will be easier to control or control it. The outpouring of anger will only have a bad impact on the development of the child's behavior. Don't toddlers learn a lot from what they see and hear? The Prophet also taught me how to treat children. Abu Hurayrah Ra narrated that one time the Prophet kissed Hasan bin Ali and nearby there was Al-Arqa' bin Hayis At-Tamimi sitting. He then said, "I have ten children and I have never kissed any of them." The Prophet looked at him and said, "Whoever does not love will not be loved." (HR. Bukhari)

Parenting and educating children is indeed the mother's main task, but cooperation is also needed to relieve her duties. Once upon a time the father helped or took over homework and children by inviting the closest people who could be asked for help. If you have relatively older children, you can instill understanding in them to help manage daily household tasks. Teach the principle of cooperation and responsibility from an early age to the child, so that he is used to being independent, initiative and reliable.

Very fatigue can also sometimes cause stress, so you are very easily angry. Children are not the target of your anger. Make careful selection of activities. Especially if you are currently pregnant. Fatigue, emotional instability will have a bad effect on the baby in the womb.

Increase your patience in dealing with children. If not with patience, how can you possibly be able to deal with every problem children well from waking up to going back to sleep. Patience accompanied by sincere intentions solely to seek the pleasure of Allah SWT will be an extraordinary energy. No matter how hard the burdens and tests given through children, God willing will be able to be faced lightly. In addition to patience, trust in Allah SWT. There's no problem that there's no completion. Same with the children's issues. And do not forget, pray always ask for the help of Allah SWT in solving the problems of children. Sometimes we try to be optimal to treat and give our best. But only God opens the eyes, hearts and minds of our children to understand what we want.

Reposted on the @kaosbapaksholeh dawah T-shirt