Tips for educating brilliant children

MY SON Mus'ab got 11As in the last SPM 2020 examination. On Facebook and WhatsApp, there are some close acquaintances and relatives who ask for tips on educating a child. I'm just answering briefly,

"God wants him to be clever, he's smart."

That's a short version of the answer, appropriately answered in the comments section and simply celebrating a question. This time I want to share the long version answers a little bit.

Tip 1: It is God who determines our child is clever or 'stupid'.

I try to apply the philosophy of da'wah in children's education. In da'wah, God does not see our preaching accepted or not. But God sees if we are truly trying to preach or not. Noah U.S. preached for 950 years. His followers are only 80 people. God didn't say the U.S. Prophet Noah failed. God's wrath is when we abandon the preaching work.

When someone receives our preaching call, it is God who guides him. Our preaching is only his ashtray. We can't stab the chest by saying:

"It is with my missionary policy that this person can be hidayah."

That's a wrong understanding. The same is true when people reject our preaching. We don't have to 'too' blame ourselves. If Allah does not want to give guidance, even great preachers like the Prophet Muhammad PBUH will not be able to accept the preaching. Imagine that the Prophet himself could not open the heart of his beloved uncle Abu Talib to accept Islam.

In the missionary world, what matters is effort, not results. Philosophy or understanding is what I try to apply in the world of education, whether I'm a father or a teacher. Parents and teachers are preachers, children and pupils are mad'u (the alleged person).

If Allah wants to give our child a 'hidayah' like getting 11A SPM, then our child will still get 11As even if we don't educate the child at all. That's why when people ask me about tips on educating a child, my short answer is,

"God wants him to be clever, he's smart."

On the other hand, if God wants to make our child 'stupid', bring even national education figures to educate him, our children will be 'stupid' too.

This paradigm is important so that, if our child gets the 11A decision, we remain humble because we realize that our child's policies are a gift from God. God wants to see if we're grateful or not.

On the other hand, if our child gets 11E, we can remain calm, not overly depressed. Perhaps we have educated our children well, only god wants to test us by having a 'stupid' child.

It may be that a parent whose child gets 11E is better at educating him in God's sight than the parents whose child gets 11A. Anyway, everything is God's test. If a child gets 11A, that's the thanksgiving test. If a child gets 11E, it's a test of patience for parents. A successful educator is an educator who successfully overcomes that test of gratitude and patience.

Tip 2: 'Oriented Effort' VS 'Oriented Results'

(This 2nd tip I shared in 2017. I'm just updating)

My 'motto' in educating children (and pupils) is;

"The important thing is that we work, the result of which is God's affairs."

More or less that's it. People who are 'oriented results', prioritizing the number of A's in exams. I prefer 'oriented effort'. That means, the priority in education is not how many A's our children get, but how we are willing to educate, and the child's (pupils) determination to learn.

So, the reward system is also different. For the 'oriented' man, he would say to his son,

"If you get 11A, father will give it so much...".

I've never laid any targets like that.

From a 'oriented effort' perspective, I said,

"If you do a good school job, follow the teacher's advice, pray frequently, allocate a few minutes each day to review lessons, read beneficial books, pray every time after prayer, concentrate in class, not play games, etc., father will give you so much."

For me, when the child has finished answering the exam to the best of his ability, then that is a success for him. I celebrate that breakthrough day on the day of exam completion, rather than during the day out exam results.

I am more comfortable with this 'oriented effort' because for me this is closer to the Islamic missionary philosophy that I understand.

"God doesn't see our results, but God looks at our efforts."

Even though my son got 11As in SPM, it's not necessarily my efforts and ways of educating me better than the parents whose children get 11E.

There are more tips to share. But I'm afraid it's going to be so long. I'm stopping here. Thanks for reading to the end. Either way, I'm still learning. If it's wrong, please show me.

BASRI DIN KAMAR – HARAKAHDAILY 12/7/2021

Original Source: https://m.facebook.com/100000259785486/posts/4471974199487862/